Las Mierdas

I mentioned before that for an hour on Wednesdays I am teaching an after-school class of six 11-year-olds at an elementary school.

Well, I'm sure you've been wondering how it has been going...Allow me to start from the beginning.

On my first day, I was nervous. I was suddenly very aware of my inexperience with teaching, especially in regards to children. But I came prepared.

With some helpful tips from my TEFL training and advice from my boss, I managed to plan an hour-long lesson. It starts with a "Hello" greeting song (kids love songs). Then I take a more serious tone (just to mix it up) and set classroom rules (which apparently is essential for effective classroom management). Then I bring back the fun with an icebreaker game for the students to get to know me (True or False: I have met Barack Obama). Finally, the class ends with the students walking around the room and introducing themselves to one another to practice their greetings. And if all else fails, I filled my backpack with candy (for some casual bribing).

The first class went really well. The 5 girls and 1 boy (poor guy) were friendly and energetic. We completed my entire lesson with ease. We made our classroom rules on the poster board I brought in. They loved singing the greeting song and my icebreaker game (totally did not believe that I had met Barack). They're 11-years-old, so they're a little beyond that affectionate age when they look up at you wide-eyed and hug you goodbye. But, they seemed to be diggin' the class. I even bribed, I mean, rewarded them at the end of the lesson with my candy.

The second class was a little tougher. They were a tad more hyper than before, and it was harder to keep them under control. They began to tease the only boy in the class (poor Eman) and throw erasers at each other. We got through the lesson, though, and began our numbers unit with a rowdy game of bingo. (Turns out, Spanish kids LOVE bingo.)

The third class was a little tougher still. Their hyper-active nature began to become a real problem. They started to demonstrate that they could care less about the classroom rules, and began to whine until we played bingo. So I implemented a reward system of sorts: Every student has five pieces of blue paper. If a student does not follow the classroom rules, the teacher takes away a piece of paper. The students who are left with five pieces of paper at the end of the lesson receive a prize. This seemed to instill a bit of fear, and they behaved themselves the rest of the class.

By the fourth class, my clever reward system lost total effectiveness. Mass chaos followed.

And so the truth is, and that which I have not mentioned before, is that every Wednesday I come home with a headache and a strong inclination for a mental breakdown.

And when my roommates ask me how my class with the kids went, I can barely push out an "okay." Because the truth is, the class is awful. I have even begun to call them "las mierdas" which basically means "the shitheads," a not-so-subtle way of showing my feelings towards the class.

....But this is just beginner's (bad)luck, right? ...I'm just new at this, right? ....It will get better, right?

I think I'm going to need a lot more candy.